


a ( not so ) regular day

by smartbuckley



Category: 9-1-1 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Chronic Pain, Communication, Eddie Diaz Admits to his Mistakes, Evan "Buck" Buckley Deserves an Apology, Getting Together, Love Confessions, M/M, Making Out, Mentions of Eddie Diaz Street Fighting, Missing Scene, Physical Disability, Season/Series 03, leg massage
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-16
Updated: 2020-03-16
Packaged: 2021-03-01 03:00:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,444
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23168143
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/smartbuckley/pseuds/smartbuckley
Summary: Buck wakes up in pain, pain which affects him throughout the day. Though the pain is something he can get used to rather quickly - the fact that Eddie shows up at his home with food, and admits to some truths? That's something Buck isn't so sure on.
Relationships: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz
Comments: 18
Kudos: 438
Collections: 9-1-1 Tales





	a ( not so ) regular day

**Author's Note:**

> Ooooh, this is something I'm very proud of. While there is no physical disability, I do mark down Buck's leg as being a physical disability because the chronic pain he's going to have from that should be considered. And don't come at me about that, I do have a physical disability myself, which gives me chronic pain in my legs/knees/ankles - which is also where I got a lot of Buck's experiences from in this fic. Fic takes place between Halloween and Christmas in the show. If I missed any tags/triggers, please let me know. Enjoy ♥

When Buck woke up that morning, blinking awake slowly and hiding under his comforter due to the sun shining diligently, he knew immediately that the day was going to be a bad one. Letting out a small groan, Buck closed his eyes and breathed the best he could through the pain that was radiating from his left leg. Ever since his leg was pinned, he’s had moments where there’s been a flash of pain but ever since the tsunami, those moments have been happening more and more, and Buck hates it, because, if anything, they’ve also been happening for longer periods of time, which have never been fun. At first, he thought he could handle the moments of pain, especially since they were few and far between but then, one day, the pain had lasted practically all night, stopping him from sleeping and, when he had to go to work the next day -- well, let’s just say thank heavens he was being ignored still at that point. And it hadn’t stopped that next day, either, Buck remembers, cringing as pain shoots through his leg once more, ending just above his knee that has the man cringing and moving ever so slowly to try and get comfortable.

Buck knew though, that trying to move into a comfortable position would not help him, because if anything, sometimes it only worsened and, if he had to work today, he was not looking forward to that. However, Buck slowly remembered that today was his day off, and he wouldn’t have to be questioned by  _ everyone  _ he knew if he was alright, or fit to work, or something or other that only annoyed him more than anything. Sure, he had been ‘forgiven’ for doing the lawsuit, even though he knew he was in the right, and really, didn’t need to be forgiven but apologized to, but he still found himself, from time to time, being questioned when something went wrong, or he got injured somehow.

Knowing he needed to get going with his day, if only so that it seemed normal, Buck slowly sat up, hissing out in slight pain as he lifted himself up and moved his leg so that it was off his bed, bent slightly irregularly until he managed to get to the edge of his bed, having moved to the middle. Breathing carefully, Buck placed his foot down on the floor. He continued his breathing exercises, hoping against hope that, as he stood up, the pain wouldn’t cause him to wobble, but unfortunately, he had no such luck, falling back onto his bed the moment he tried to put pressure on his leg. Letting out a small groan, Buck let himself fall back onto the bed, his hands rubbing his face in exhaustion before running through his hair.

The urge to stay in bed all day was greater than any urge Buck had, but he knew that he would need to go downstairs eventually, if only so he could have some food. Briefly, he cursed himself for staying in this damn apartment with one bathroom on the second floor, and a huge amount of stairs, but with another groan, Buck found himself sitting back up and putting more pressure onto his leg, clenching his teeth as he does so. He does this for a few minutes before he feels confident in being able to stand up. And, after a few minutes, he does indeed stand up without falling back down and smiling softly at himself, he slowly makes his way to the bathroom, doing his routine to the best he can in the moment before heading towards the stairs and cringing a little.

“There’s no way I’m going to be able do walk down all those fucking steps,” he mutters to himself, closing his eyes and pinching the bridge of his nose, trying a few more breathing exercises as he does so. After a minute of keeping his eyes closed, Buck slowly steps down one step, then the second, and then the third before he leans back, carefully placing his ass on the top step while breathing through the pain, keeping his bad leg stretched and his good leg bent. When he’s finally comfortable enough, he slowly guides himself down the steps, making sure not to jostle his bad leg until his feet hit the bottom of the floor. Carefully standing up, Buck heads towards the small linen closet off to the side of his kitchen, opening the door with a small groan, grabbing his crutches thankfully.

His entire body is sweat-soaked from all of the work, and as much as he hates using his crutches, he knows that on a day like today, it’s better to use the crutches instead of suffering silently. When he finally has the crutches under his armpits, Buck takes another breath before heading to the kitchen and then looking around, trying to figure out what he wants in the late morning.

Letting out a small groan, Buck slumps his head forward, blinking a few minutes before straightening up and carefully grabbing a bowl and some of Christopher’s cereal that’s been left over from before the tsunami. The kid might not have been around lately, but Buck is thankful right now for the cereal, if only because he doesn’t want to cook a lot. Letting out a small groan when he realizes that he’s going to have to eat his cereal at the kitchen island instead of the couch, Buck slowly sets out to getting everything out, and pouring the cereal into the bowl, and then grabbing some milk, trying his best not to spill anything as he sets his crutches to the side. He stays at the island for who knows how long, eating his cereal slowly, cringing every few minutes as pain courses through his leg. It takes him a little longer to eat the cereal because of the pain he feels but eventually, he does finish, and slowly sets out to wash his two dishes before letting them air dry on the rack that he, thankfully, left out; then grabbed a few water bottles and placing them in his arms and pockets. Taking another deep breath, Buck grabs his crutches and heads towards his couch, moaning in relief when he finally manages to sit down onto his couch, carefully lifting his left leg so it was resting on his couch, his eyes closing as he continued to feel relieved.

He spent the rest of the morning like that, drinking water every now and then and watching whatever television shows and movies he could find without having to get up and do something. At one point, he looked for his phone before realizing it was still upstairs, no doubt plugged in and charged, but not wanting to have to deal with that, and not believing for one moment anyone would be trying to reach him, Buck let it stay upstairs without caring too much, continuing to let his thoughts be distracted by whatever was playing on the television. 

It wasn’t until shortly after lunch, early in the afternoon that Buck heard a key in his door and tilting his head up, he found himself frowning, curious as to who the hell would be coming into his home. Well -- no. He knew it was either Eddie or Maddie, since they were the only one with keys, but Buck didn’t believe for one second either of them were up to visiting him so carefully, slowly, he sat up straighter on the couch, arching his eyebrow when the door opens and reveals Eddie, juggling some food with his keys.

“What are you doing here?” Buck can’t help but ask, inwardly cringing at how abrupt he sounds but knowing there’s nothing he can do about it now. He feels himself relaxing when Eddie closes the door and looks him over, frowning when he finally spots the crutches.

“Are you okay?” He asks and Buck lets out a soft groan, rolling his eyes.

“I’m fine, just in more pain than normal - are you going to answer my question or ask another question to avoid it?” He asks, slightly teasing as Eddie places the food down onto the table in front of the couch, still looking at the crutches before back at Buck, still frowning as a sigh escapes from him.

“Eddie--” Buck asks, tilting his head as Eddie sits down carefully next to him, making sure not to jostle his leg.

“I’ve been calling and text you all morning, and you haven’t answered, so I decided to pop on over and see if you were alive,” Eddie interrupts and Buck can’t stop himself from arching his eyebrow, not completely believing Eddie but not saying anything else, either, waiting to see if his best friend would say anything else. When Eddie remains quiet, moving forward to grab the Chinese he brought with him, Buck can’t help but let out a sigh, feeling slightly frustrated with Eddie.

Ever since Buck’s apology to the man, things haven’t been the same between them, though not without trying. Buck still feels like everything he’s doing is angering Eddie, that everything that’s happening is a mistake on Buck’s part. And currently watching his best friend, Buck didn’t know what was going through Eddie’s mind, like normal, and he didn’t know what Eddie was even doing here, since --

“Shouldn’t you be at work?” Buck asks after a minute or so, moving forward himself to grab some of the Chinese, being extra careful with it due to his leg, all while looking at Eddie out of the corner of his eye. He can see Eddie tense, his shoulders rising and his hand clenching his fork briefly before he relaxes, and Buck can’t help but frown, even as Eddie turns towards him and smiles slightly.

“Cap gave me the next few days off,” Eddie says and Buck frowns even more, turning towards his friend completely, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion as he stops eating.

“Why?” He can’t help but ask before looking away, opening and closing his mouth, sputtering an excuse that Eddie doesn’t need to answer that if he doesn’t want to, but Buck stops when he feels Eddie’s hand on his ankle, squeezing lightly.

“Buck, hey, hey,” Eddie says, frowning at Buck until Buck is looking at him completely before he continues, “You don’t have to do that. You don’t have to continue worrying that I’m going to be mad at you for doing something, or asking something. We’re best friends, and I’m sorry I’ve made you feel that way--”

“Eddie, I know--”

“I know you know, but I’m going to keep telling you this, man. I’m sorry that I’ve made you feel this way, and I will continue to promise to help you realize that,” Eddie says and Buck feels like he can only nod his head, letting out a breath but he frowns when he realizes that Eddie is playing with his food.

“So why did Bobby give you a few days off?” Buck asks, continuing to watch Eddie carefully, cringing a little when a sharp pain shoots up and down his leg. He lets out a light hiss but shakes his head when Eddie turns to face him completely with a frown on his face.

“We can focus on me  _ after _ you answer my question, Eddie,” Buck says, arching his eyebrow, feeling like the ball is about to drop as Eddie lets out a huff of air.

“I uh -- when everything was going on with the lawsuit, I had a lot of anger issues going on with me,” Eddie begins and Buck frowns, tilting his head in thought as he remembers the grocery store debacle, but he remains quiet, waiting to see what Eddie has to say.

“And uh, at one point, I ended up in jail because of an asshole who thought I was abusing a disability parking spot,” Eddie huffs, and Buck arches his eyebrow, remembering the grocery store fight even more, the confusion he felt when Eddie had shouted that Buck wasn’t around to bail him out of jail.

“So that whole hypothetical about me bailing you out of a jail was…”

“Not a hypothetical,” Eddie says with a nod and Buck can’t help but chuckle, shaking his head and eating his food, missing the way Eddie cringes.

“So, I gotBoskotobailmeout,” Eddie says fast and Buck frowns, turning towards Eddie, feeling even more confused, his head tilted.

“Want to say that again, Eds?”

“So, I got Bosko to bail me out, that day.” Eddie repeats and Buck can feel his stomach clench at that statement, his entire body tensing as he begins to play with his own food, insecurities rising up at the mention of Bosko.

“And then she brought me… well, to an illegal street fight that night, to get my anger out,” Eddie adds and Buck can’t help but turn towards his friend with wide eyes, his mouth dropping open in surprise, his heart pounding in his chest.

“Are you  _ insane _ ? Please tell me it was only one fight,” Buck groans, shaking his head before narrowing his eyes when Eddie looks away and his leg begins to shake.

“Okay, different question - are you fucking  _ stupid _ , Eddie?” Buck asks, doing his best to sit up straight against the couch, ignoring the way Eddie is trying to help him, his hands slapping Eddie’s own away as there’s a scowl on his face.

“So you what, went back to street fighting after the first time?” Buck asks, a scowl on his face as Eddie tilts his head. 

“Yes. And then, uh, I was really good. Like, undefeated good, so I was invited to uh, underground fighting,” Eddie admits and Buck can’t help the groan escaping from him as he shakes his head.

“And that explains all of the extra cash you had lying around,” Buck says, scowling when Eddie looks at him with a cringe. Buck lets out a huff of breath, shaking his head before he continues eating his food, anger coursing through him that he tries to control and calm down.

“So how did Bobby find out?” Buck asks, ignoring the weight of Eddie’s stare on him as he asks his question and Eddie decides how to answer.

“Well, during one of my fights, I uh, hit the guy a little too hard. Broke his nose, and his cartilage went down his throat,” Eddie says and Buck’s eyes snap back to his friend’s, a frown still on Buck’s face.

“And you called 911?” Buck asks, Eddie nodding.

“It was Bosko’s team. She uh - talking to Bobby about something, but her Captain had come with her, since he recognized me, and talked to Bobby about it,” Eddie admits and Buck wants to be angry at Bosko, but it’s bad enough he’s jealous, so instead, he just continues frowning at Eddie, arching his eyebrow when Eddie remains silent, before he shrugs.

“That’s pretty much it. Bobby called me into his office, told me I had a few days off to work through my issues--” Eddie stops here when Buck’s fork falls to the ground, and he tries to breathe deeply, closing his eyes momentarily.

“Is it your leg?” Eddie asks, straightening up and Buck shakes his head, letting out a chuckle in disbelief.

“So instead of suspending you, or going to the higher ups, he gives you a few days off?” Buck asks, still chuckling in disbelief, ignoring how Eddie sits back with a look of confusion.

“Man, I don’t even know what would have happened if I had fucked up like that,” Buck snorts and he can almost see when it clicks in Eddie’s head, his mouth dropping open in surprise as he shakes his head.

“Buck, hey, no--” Eddie begins but Buck shakes his head, another scoff escaping from him as he hums, not sure what to say. He has to take another few deep breaths, closing his eyes once more, rubbing his chest carefully as he tries to let go of the anger he can feel coursing through him until he feels like he’s calm enough to open his eyes and look at Eddie without feeling angry.

“So you decided to come here...why?” Buck asks arching his eyebrow, ignoring the way Eddie looks at him carefully before he exhales, shrugging his shoulders and continuing to eat his food.

“Maybe because I missed hanging out with my best friend,” Eddie says after a few minutes and Buck can’t help but hum in response, turning back towards the television and continuing to eat his food, getting distracted by what’s playing. The two men stay quiet until the next set of commercials, at which point there’s another flare of pain that shoots up his leg, and he can’t stop the hiss of pain that escapes through his teeth, which have become clenched.

Without much thought, Buck quickly places his takeout container on the table, both hands going to his left leg as he tries to massage the pain out it, relaxing when Eddie’s own hands join and massage the portions of Buck’s leg that he can’t reach.

“Has it been bothering you like this often?” Eddie asks and Buck nods his head, not wanting to admit just how long, since he knows it’s just another fuck up of his, but Buck can’t find himself surprised when Eddie hums and asks if it’s been like this since the tsunami. He doesn’t want to admit to it, but he does, nodding once more as Eddie’s eyes soften.

“Do you want an ice pack, or anything?” Eddie asks and Buck shakes his head in the negative, doing his best to continue breathing normally, his hands stopping the motions of massaging around his leg, though Eddie continues, and Buck can’t stop himself from thanking his friend as he does so, a small smile on his face when Eddie nods.

“You okay?” Eddie asks after a few minutes, and Buck can’t help the small sigh that escapes him as he nods, his body relaxing into the couch and grabbing his water bottle, drinking from it and ignoring the way his cheeks turn red when he feels Eddie’s eyes on him.

“You do know that Bobby wouldn’t have--” Eddie begins but Buck shakes his head, glaring at his friend lightly.

“We both know that’s not true, Eddie. Please don’t -- it’s still --” Buck starts and then finishes, shrugging before nearly jumping when he feels Eddie’s hands on his, their fingers interlacing.

“I’m sorry,” Eddie whispers and Buck nods, removing his one hand and wiping his eyes, chuckling and then scoffing.

“God, you must think of me as weak,” Buck snorts, ignoring the way Eddie shakes his head and moves a little, watching Buck’s leg as he does so.

“I think the opposite, actually,” Eddie whispers and Buck looks at him from under his lashes, taking a deep inhale before exhaling, biting his lower lip as he frowns. Buck can’t find it in himself to believe that Eddie means that, and he’s opening his mouth to Eddie so when his friend shakes his head and gives him a look.

“You’ve been through so much, Buck. You’re stronger than a lot of people, and need to give yourself some credit.” Eddie says and Buck doesn’t know how to respond to that, his cheeks turning red, so he looks away and clears his throat.

“Plus - your leg went through something traumatic, just like you did. It’s not going to be something that goes away when you’re all better, mostly,” Eddie adds on and Buck looks at him with wide eyes, his entire body tensing before relaxing as another pain shoots through his leg and he cringes.

Eddie must see him cringe though because his hands are back on his leg, massaging it and Buck can’t help the sigh of relief that he lets out, eyes closing as he leans against his couch and a small moan slips free, Eddie chuckling in response. Buck would feel embarrassed about the moan that had slipped free, but his relationship with Eddie had been changing before everything had happened, and he couldn’t find himself feeling embarrassed about it now.

The time passes as Eddie continues to massage his leg, the pain slowly receding with each deep push Eddie does and Buck can’t stop himself from watching his friend, eyes becoming hooded as he wonders if the two will ever get back to the relationship they had growing before Buck had to go and fuck everything up. At one point, Eddie looks up at Buck instead of looking at his leg and he doesn’t look away, tilting his head instead and smiling softly, Buck’s stomach rolling with something he doesn’t want to focus on.

“Did you know that you are incredibly easy to read,” Eddie says after a few moments and Buck opens and closes his mouth before shaking his head, not knowing that. When Eddie stops massaging his leg, Buck makes a small whimper that he immediately tries to cover up, blinking owlishly at his friend when Eddie hums in response.

“Did you know, the entire time I was mad at you, I was also mad at myself for falling in love with you?” Eddie asks and Buck sucks back an exhale of breath, shaking his head in surprise as his eyes widen. He can feel his heart pounding inside of his chest, and he has no idea how to react to that news, so he finds himself blinking continuously at his best friend, opening and closing his mouth until Eddie lets out a small chuckle and then goes back to gently massaging Buck’s leg.

“I’ve been in love with you since -- I guess since you called Carla to help me. I didn’t want to admit, especially when Shannon came back around--” Eddie stops here with a frown and Buck can’t help but frown himself, not sure what to say to his friend.

“And then Shannon died, and I focused on mourning her, and then --”

“And then?” Buck asks when Eddie stops once more and takes a deep breath. Buck watches as Eddie turns towards him, his massage going deeper into Buck’s leg and having him hiss out a breath, Eddie cringing in apology.

“And then you were pinned under a truck with a man threatening to bomb the area around him - which included you,” Eddie admits and Buck doesn’t look away from Eddie, not when he sees such a haunted look in his friends eyes.

“I didn’t want to lose you, Buck. It had been bad enough, losing Shannon but that night, with the bomb and the kid - I had a big fear of losing you while knowing that I had done nothing about my feelings for you,” Eddie admits and Buck can’t stop himself from leaning forward, placing his hands on Eddie’s, stopping the man from massaging his leg as he bends his right leg and tries to move so he’s sitting closer to his friend.

“So then you had your surgeries, and your therapy, and the entire time---”

“The entire time, I was falling in love with you,” Buck interrupts, his voice soft as Eddie looks up at him with a small smile, nodding gently.

“And then it was just one thing after another,” Buck adds after a few moments, shrugging his shoulders while Eddie lets out a snort, interlacing their fingers together and exhaling.

“And each time something happened to you, I panicked and I worried, and I wondered if I was ever going to be able to tell you how in love I was with you,” Eddie says and Buck closes his eyes momentarily, before opening them and lifting their hands to his mouth, kissing Eddie’s knuckles while Eddie smiles at him.

“So the fighting--” Buck begins before stopping, biting his lower lip, not sure how to continue with his thoughts. Not surprisingly though, Eddie lets out a small snort, shaking his head as he exhales once more and shifts so that his knees are supporting his head.

“I was so angry, man. At myself, at the circumstances that kept getting thrown at you. At the fact that it felt like I couldn’t talk to you--” Eddie begins, shrugging his shoulders before he continues, “So I decided that fighting would help me release all of that anger. But then you came back, and Bobby found out, and now he’s making me go to a therapist and I miss my best friend. I miss the moments we had together, where I wasn’t exactly sure if I would kiss you or laugh at you,” Eddie snorts and Buck can’t help but let out his own chuckle, squeezing Eddie’s hand before looking at him with an arched eyebrow.

“Was Halloween one of those moments?” He asks, a small smirk playing on his face as Eddie chuckles once more.

“Oh definitely. I wanted to kiss you so damn bad when I was forgiving you,” Eddie admits and Buck can’t help but let out another laugh, moving closer and bending his left leg carefully, but not at a ninety degree angle, either.

“So what’s stopping you from kissing me, now?” Buck asks, a teasing glint in his eyes, Eddie chuckling once more before they both lean forward and kiss one another. The kiss is slow, tentative, both men getting used to the feeling of one another before it begins to get more passionate as the minutes go by, Buck’s hands going to Eddie’s neck as Eddie moves his body around so that he’s hovering over Buck, who has leaned back against the arm of the couch. Their hands caress one another in places that cause both to moan, Buck thrusting upwards as Eddie thrusts downwards, both men knowing one another so well that they’re practically predicting one another’s movements. It isn’t until it seems like Buck is going to die without breathing that Eddie pulls away, kissing down Buck’s neck, biting and sucking him in a few spots as Buck tilts his head back and lets out another moan, his fingers running through Eddie’s hair and tugging when Eddie stops kissing him completely. 

The two continue panting before Eddie looks at Buck with a grin, and with Buck’s heart pounding inside of his chest, he can’t stop himself from grinning back, shifting his leg a little to get comfortable, Eddie letting his body fall on top of Buck’s as their lunch lies forgotten on the table, trading slow kisses between multiple conversations the two have about everything and anything until eventually, both men fall asleep, knowing that things between them will only get better from here on out.

**Author's Note:**

> I realize that in the show, Eddie didn't get sent home or anything, but that's just really unfair, so I changed it, lmao. I may do another fic where that unfairness is actually like, discussed, but who knows. Comments are loved. ♥


End file.
